December 27, 2014

Breaking Free from Anxiety by Roxane Laurin MFT

Breaking Free from Anxiety: Five Quick Ways!

Anxiety Webster’s Dictionary describes anxiety as a state full of mental distress because of danger or misfortune. We know it as that overwhelming voice in our heads that makes us feel weak, worthless, guilty, afraid, stupid,   panicky and sick. It stifles our voice and crushes our creativity.  Here are a few steps for breaking free from anxiety.

  1. Relax your body: Take a slow breath through your nose. Hold it for half a minute. Breathe out slowly from your mouth. Do this three or more times to calm yourself and be able to think more clearly. Repeat this exercise several times a day if you struggle with anxiety often.
  2. Physical Exercise: Stop your moody rumination and take a walk around the block, work out with an exercise CD or take out children to the park and have a relay race!
  3. Fight back! Don’t let yourself believe those lies about yourself! Make a list of five things that you do well.
  4. Call a good friend for encouragement.
  5. Do something creative! Make yourself do a creative activity that your enjoy, such as singing, playing a musical instrument, drawing, making a craft, cooking something delicious, playing with your children’s play dough, etc

You may have other ways of breaking free from anxiety. Choose something that will change your thinking and make you feel good about yourself. I have struggled with anxiety and understand the feeling of being trapped in its net! I enjoy helping people that feel overwhelmed by it. Roxane Laurin contact me at 310-971-6385

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December 27, 2014

Four Steps for Better Communication with your Teen by Roxane Laurin, MFT

 

In today’s busy culture, the teenage years can be so full of changes and challenges that parents feel they are constantly struggling with their teens. All families need a household climate that is peaceful and not constantly struggling with angry outbursts and arguments. Having a peaceful home is the responsibility of both parents.

In today’s busy culture, the teenage years can be so full of changes and challenges that parents feel they are constantly struggling with their teens. All families need a household climate that is peaceful and not constantly struggling with angry outbursts and arguments. Having a peaceful home is the responsibility of both parents and teens. As parents, however, we must take the lead. Here are some techniques that can help:

  1. Make sure that you and your spouse have a stable and cooperative relationship. Make sure that you and your spouse are on the same page as far as rules for your teen.  If you disagree with your spouse discuss this privately between yourselves. It is very important to avoid your teenager from getting involved in private disagreements between you and your spouse. Get counseling help for you and your spouse if this has been a frequent issue.

 

  1. Be a model for your teen. Speak respectfully to your teen and do not allow your teen to be disrespectful. Refuse to engage in angry arguments. Do not make fun of her, or make rude or disparaging remarks to her.

 

  1. If you teen talks to you in a rude manner, stop the discussion. Tell him, “I need you to stop the screaming, rude words, etc. Because I am your mother (father) and I love you, we need to discuss this in a calmer manner.  Let’s take some time to cool down.  I’m setting a timer and we can discuss this in after dinner, or tomorrow afternoon at 4:00, etc. (It is important to keep to your promise and have the discussion at the time you promised. However, if either you or are not calm enough to restart the discussion, you can postpone it for a few hours.

 

  1. Be patience! Be patient with yourself and your teen.  It screaming or rudeness has been a habit in your family; it will take some time to develop respectful communication skills. It is best for the parent to take the lead in apologizing for screaming or being rude to your teen.

 

Your teen is slowly changing to an adult and needs to gradually take on adult responsibility. Also, treating others with respect is necessary skill for success in the adult world that she will be entering.  Remember that as parents you have the strongest influence on your teens and their behavior.